Monday, March 16, 2020 Day 1 of semi-self-isolation-social-distancing and being a productive human

As you can probably predict from the end of the previous post (wine), I did NOT get up at a decent hour on Monday morning. I don’t think I even got out of my pajamas until noon. So far, not so good. 

Our friend Kiki (ok, we can her Kristen, but Kiki just sounds so exotic and makes me seem cooler than I am) texted to say she was off to the grocery store, did we need anything? Actually, yes, we did need stuff, but my list was a little too long to ask someone to shop for it. Basically, we were all stocking up on pantry items, preparing for the impending apocalyptic shut-down. I mean, we had already read about, and seen with our own eyes, the empty shelves in the stores (honestly people, you know you can wash your ass in the shower, WHY are you hoarding toilet paper???), so the time was now to make sure the pantry was full. Personally, I had been adding a little more to my grocery cart over the last week. But my idea of making sure I was ready for a quarantine are the following items: baking supplies; wine; fresh fruits; wine; vegetables with a longer shelf life; wine; cans of coconut milk; wine. You get the point. I like wine. 

However, even with this extra shopping, I was feeling the need to add some more things to my supply. For example, Cuca, our dog, (she’s the bestest dog, and will be 15 years old next month) eats a high falutin diet of people food. I am not kidding. I make her an Instant Pot meal every week: grass fed beef (duh) or organic ground turkey, organic sweet potatoes or carrots, organic cauliflower or cabbage. I got a little panicky I would not have enough food. For the dog. So, off I went to brave the supermarkets….

Stop #1: Barons. Wiped clean (pun intended) of all fresh or frozen protein (beef, chicken, turkey, seafood). No frozen foods period. But, plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables. I think it’s really weird that people don’t buy fresh stuff while it’s still available. Popped a couple of items in my cart and off I went to my next destination.

Stop #2: Sprouts Market. (Mostly) wiped clean of all fresh or frozen protein. Again, plenty of produce. I did score some frozen grass-fed, organic ground beef. So, you bet your ass I literally swept the shelf into my reusable grocery bag (oh, did you miss the part above about my dog’s diet?). I know I looked like an absolute doomsday hoarder and it was all I could do to NOT explain to people why I needed that much meat. 

Stop #3: Target. I walked out empty handed. Frozen food section was decimated. There was no fresh protein. There was definitely no toilet paper. 

By the time I got home from all this shopping, it was mid-afternoon, and what had I really accomplished all day? Grocery shopping.  WAIT. That’s not true. Remember the fridge/freezer situation I mentioned earlier? Well, with all this extra meat, it became imperative that I rectify that situation STAT. So, I did spend time defrosting and cleaning out that freezer, in the process finding out that, apparently, I am a bacon hoarder. I will just say this: we aren’t running out of bacon annnnnnnytime soon in this house! 

Feeling quite chuffed with myself for crossing one thing off my list…WAIT. I also worked out for 40 minutes in my backyard. I AM ABSOLUTELY KILLING THIS FORCED STAYCATION GAME. Anyway, feeling quite chuffed with myself, I set about preparing dinner, listening to Hipster Cocktail Radio on Pandora, bee bopping around the kitchen, when Rob asks “glass of wine?” AND. I. SAID. “NO!” Not today Satan. I won’t make it through this ordeal if I drink wine every night. Ok, that’s bullshit. I will absolutely make it through with flying colors if I drink wine every night, but I might not exactly be the most productive version of myself if I do so. 

So, we went to bed (after watching Stranger Things), I set my alarm to get up the next morning, and vowed to be out of my pajamas before noon the next day.